singing in the car

Oh how I wish I could sing. I mean I have the capability of singing, but not without making people plug their ears… I don’t care though I roll my windows down, crank up the tunes, and sing to my hearts content! Goodness some albums you cant help but singing as loud as you can; Katy Perry, Ashley Simpson, Hillary Duff, Shiny Toy Guns, All American Rejects, just to name a few. Even if you don’t necessarily like them and don’t make a habit of listening to them with people in the car when N Sync, Spice Girls, or Backstreet Boys come on you cant help but turn it up! Haha I love it! I get weird glances from strangers in cars and some people that join in all the time! I don’t care, it actually adds to the fun! Anyone with me on that?

Blended Families part one

It is so hurtful to the children when you divide them and look at them in levels. I was on the receiving end of negativity on my fathers side. He remarried this woman who I used to adore! She was nice and charming and had this daughter who soon became one of my best friends. I would come home to my mothers house and tell her all of the wonderful things she did with us and the great times we had having family dinners and family outings and playing board games. Soon the division started...
her daughter (who I never disliked through this we remained friends outside of their house) became obviously favored in that house. She lived there half the time and my brother and I were there every other weekend. My dad isn't one to start things or say that we should go out to the park or the movies or spend time together, he is a nice guy too and relies on other people to tell him what he wants to do. I think it rubbed off a little on me.
Christmas was always hard on me as a child, the presents were very obviously piled higher for one child. (by the way my sister is only 1 month older than I am) It really wasn't about the fact that I received less it was the obvious favoritism towards her. During the weekends I was there i would love spending time with my sis, her mother would get jealous and send me to my room to play away from her while she spent "mother daughter" time with her. She did get her other days too. This happened most weekends. I felt very alone in that house yet to try to bond more with my dad I moved in for a school year, BIG MISTAKE! It got worse and worse even though the excuse that she is there "half of the time" was no longer there the same things kept going on. I felt very ignored, my father (i believe escaping from life) watched a lot of TV and was very distant from me.
EVERY thing i did seamed to be wrong so i avoided things even more. One day i couldnt get a hold of anyone to pick me up from school not knowing it was a half day on Wednesdays and walked home, I knew the combo to the garage so i was able to get into the house (we lived less then 1/2 a mile from the school and other kids were walking too) I got in huge trouble because someone could have kidnapped me (i am 13 at the time) and i could have been killed. 2 DAYS later my step mom told me it would be easier if from then on I could walk to and from school. WOW! I still haven't gotten over the irony of it.
I decided to move out of that house the end of the school year and after that my father and I went about 3 years barely talking, I hardly went over to their house anymore maybe once every couple of months to see my sister who was born when I was 10 from my step mom and dad. The reason for this was because they said that I was no longer welcome in that house! It was the saddest thing to hear as a 13 year old girl.
Another Christmas I do not remember what year I went to my step mom's families Christmas party and my step sister did not go with us. When we were opening present guess who had NONE in front of her "I did not know you were coming" was the excuse yet my sister had many sitting waiting for her, y biological brother received a few (a fifty dollar mall gift card and some clothes) I sat there pretending to feel included in the family.
My mothers family did the whole blending thing PERFECTLY! They included my step brother and sister with open arms (after they got used to the fact my mom remarried lol they loved my dad) Christmas is always fun and warm and we all feel like a family! Everyone was included the the annual grandchildren Christmas party my grandmother throws! Everyone is open and talks and laughs and eats. We feel together. I just wish i could feel like that with my father.
I have tried several times to tell them how I felt growing up and how unincluded and alone I felt and they just don't understand! I am sorry big venting blog here! but there is much more to type on the matter but if you have a blended family make all of the children equal and included. Set time apart to get to know your step children and let your family know how much they mean to you and that they are your family! The people and things your spouse cares about are things and people you care about! They are human beings with emotions and lives that will live on past the time they are with you but the way your family is shapes them and their futures! I have a feeling a few more blogs like this will be to come! Sorry if it is irrelevant to you, but if not please listen, think about the hearts of those children and how you would feel in that situation, how alone it already is as a child and how you can make the awkward stages go by so much easier. You don't want to push your spouses children away from their mother or father! It isn't right or fare!
Thank you

REALLY?

Goodness there are so many people who do this and it bothers me so much!!! I am guilty of it to and it bothers me even when I do it and I am in recovery from the "really" disease.
You start saying a story to your friend about something out of the ordinary that happened to you, "When I was on my way here I almost hit the emo kid that had his hood up and was obviously listening to music, i came within inches of hitting him and he didn't even know it ever happened,"
The reply, "Really?" NO NOT REALLY I JUST TOLD YOU FOR NO REASON! who started this? who was the person who started spreading the "really" disease? It is really annoying!

Body Modification

I think body modification is an expression of ones self. Just like coloring your hair to be more "you." Yes it is more extreme than that I completely agree but if someone if uncomfortable with the way thy look or they want to bring their inner self out I don't see anything wrong with that. I want plastic surgery, having two kids before i was 20 did quite a number on my body, my stomach butt look like i got a skin graph from a zebra, My boobs are much smaller and just not as flattering as they were before and I just want to be back to the way I was. The industry I am in is all about beauty and I don't feel comfortable being naked I try to so hard but it just isn't the way I feel on the inside, therefore I am getting surgery but only to look the way i did before because this isn't me. People stare at my stomach when I am in a bathing suit and it makes me even more uncomfortable. I am perfectly fine with plastic surgery, it was actually my dream job when i was younger.
Tattoos are amazing and piercings are awesome. My husband and I had gauges in our ears, we both took them out when he joined the military. I have a tattoo on my back and look forward to getting more! I have a Monroe and have also had my nose and my belly button pierced on the top and bottom. I think they are a beautiful expression of who you are! Your body is a part of who you are internally. I see it like putting makeup on it changes our appearance. I know many people see it as MUCH different and I completely respect that. The clothes we choose to wear and the accessories we choose all are an expression of self, bringing the inner self out. I see tattoos and piercings as accessories. That's my view whats yours?

Wash Rinse Repeat if needed

How many times do we have to tell people the same thing! We can say it in different ways and they always say the same thing after your rant. Some way or another they say they will change whatever it is or they will do better, try harder, be nicer, think more about your feelings, include you. Whatever the situation entails. What is the deal with that? I know it is mostly women saying this and the men who don't listen, don;'t take this the wrong way men. Why do you think the stereotypical problems in relationships is the woman is a nag and the men don't listen.
I am really really trying to not be a "nag" with my husband but sometimes it gets so frustrating hinting at things and reminding gently when it isn't working and i know it is annoying when i repeat myself to both of us! I do not like doing it at all! I do not want to be a nag! A couple of weeks ago we both got better about this on both sides! Although i think it is because He is willing to listen and gave me permission to remind him and he wouldn't get mad so i don't have to get angry. He also has permission to tell me when i am being a "nag."
This doesn't only have to do with significant others it has to do with everyone! children, coworkers, friends, parents, we are all guilty!

Bless You?

I hate it when people sneeze and get angry when people don't say bless you. Are you really worthy of every ones blessing! What about sneezing makes you so special? I try to sneeze as quietly as possible so no one hears it and I could care less if someone "blesses" me for it! Besides you are spreading virus' and bacteria into the world so it isn't like you did anything amazing that would make me want to put blessings upon you. Do I say it when I hear a sneeze... yes but that is because I don't want the whole "bless you, thank you" phrase coming all from their mouths in a rude snotty way... Ah makes me so annoyed!
Just one of my many pet peeves!

The guy in the background

Are you ever going through your pictures and notice someone in the background you don't know making a funny face or doing something weird. Sometimes it makes the whole picture amazing! It may have been a picture you may have deleted or thrown away but it was so funny that you just couldn't. I wonder how many pictures I am in that people notice i am doing something embarrassing. I am making a weird face or bending over and they have my butt in the picture. I want to see some of those i think it would be funny! How many other worlds am i in. These lives are all around me and all i think about is my own a lot of the times, and the people that fit into it. A weird thought I know