advice

Why is it people seem to want to fix everyone else's lives while their own is a mess! Why should people listen to your advice when it isnt even good enough for you? I am all for getting wise council from people who admit their lives are not perfect and are not accusing but caring. I mean if someone comes up to give you marriage advice who has been married 5 times I dont think you should take it. :-)

live... laugh... love

life has taken a turn for bad... but i have to choose to live laugh and love. As now i am a single mom of two kids and my bank account keeps getting drained before i can get to the bank... i literally have nothing. but i think it is in the broken times that you find who you truly are. Yes i break down and cry and i think that is healthy and ok. I cannot pretend that life is peachy but i can choose to live in joy and choose to laugh at all of the situations in life that i can. I am not sitting around and moping i am finding things to fill my time and people to surround myself with. I have two beautiful boys that make me so happy and they love me unconditionally and i love eternally. I have learned who my true friends are through the situation as well. They called the cops for me 2 times to make sure i was safe and have surrounded me with protection. i do not want to get too in depth into what is going on but it is very bad and hard and trust me i am very proud of myself (as bad as that sounds) for how i have handled everything in this!

sorry it has been a while

life has gotten a bit rough but i am a fighter and i will survive! A lot of crud has gone down the last few days and lets just say there is no man living in my house right now. I have amazing neighbors and friends that are helping me and showing me tons of love and support. More then half of the friends left today to go out to sea! (as you know i live in navy housing) If any of you are reading this i miss you all and cant wait for you to get back and have a kick butt party for you all when you come home. Emotions keep flying past me and i cant seem to be able to be able to read them. i think i need some time to figure things out... like how the rest of my life is going to look. i have a lot of choices but the path i was on is NOT the one i want for the rest of my life. Pray i find the right path..

What would you do?

If you came home at 6:00 in the morning and your kids were playing in the street ALONE (1 and 2 years old) Well that is what happened to me a couple days ago.... I had a babysitter watching them from 5:20 am to a little after 6:00am. The babysitter was sleeping when I went inside and my oldest son (2 and a half) had gone upstairs and gotten my youngest out of his bed (i know because the light was on and the door was open which my one year old can not do. Also the babygates were all torn down (all 3 of them) which only my oldest can do went down to the garage opened the door (which is really loud) and went outside. They also freak out when they wake up so i know they were crying. How the babysitter did not wake up to any of that is beyond me!
Well needless to say i was TERRIFIED! they could have been hit by a car, abducted, CPS could have been called.
I went and talked to my neighbors and asked if they saw them outside and one said he left for work at 6am and they were not out there at that time so it had to of only been a few minutes that they were out there but that is still scary that she didnt hear it and things can happen in the blink of an eye!

Brother Julian

My oldest sibling! he is a year and nine months older than me. His the kind of guy that when he says something it is usually funny because he said it! He is a great road trip buddy because he isnt obnoxious and has a good taste in music (and he let me play beauty and the beast, be our guest, until we had it memorized) We drove from San Diego, California to Pensacola, Florida together in 3 days and we had a blast!!!! He protected me when we were in New Orleans from the crazies and he drove when I got tired, and he made me eat when i drank too much... (he is single, any takers? hehe)
He has lots of friends and loves to have a good time! He has an interesting taste in movies and TV shows and has an encyclopedia of movie quotes in his noggin and usually wins any games having to do with such. 

He has been working the same job for 7 years and is 22 that is pretty darn good! He loves to snowboard and is getting pretty good at it!
The Picture on the right is us in Mexico when i was 17 (i am not in the pic) and the worker took my beer away and gave it to Julian so he was double fisting the beers :)
 He doesnt know how to show excitement very well but he does get excited! He has his own inner way of showing it and you know that he is happy about things but he is a generally happy person and a joy to be around!

I LOVE YOU JULIAN!

Sister Jessica!

She is so amazing! She is caring and love to take care of the underdog. Someday she will make an amazing mother (even if it is just to snakes) -inside joke!!
She moved out and made it on her own at a young age, she is beautiful and intelligent and great with people. She and I have had some fun times together!
The picture to the left is when we got LOCKED in our room on the Mexico cruise for about 12 hours!!! We didnt care until the morning because we thought the door was just sticking but the dead bolt got STUCK in the door and they had to take the whole door off the hinges to get us out! So we spent 1/3 of our cruise stuck in our room lol while I tried to calm everyone down outside and inside our room! lol but I am glad it was her i was locked away with!
We also went to school together and my sister Jessica LOVES to jump in puddles! One day after dance class she was jumping in puddles in her ballet slippers. When my mom asked her why she said, "I didnt want to get my chucks dirty!" She always knows how to make a room smile! I LOVE HER!
One time we went to 6 Flags and she had hurt her knee beforehand and i had to push her in a wheelchair all over the place! (at least we got to go on Goliath a bazillion times) :) She is a charmer and an all around awesome person! If you are looking for a friend that will not stab your back she is the most loyal friend you can have! :)

I LOVE YOU JESSICA!

Brother Chris

I am going to write a blog about each of my siblings just because i love them! 

Chris is my only FULL biological sibling! The above picture is from 6 years ago!  He is a very honest and caring! When we were younger he was a bit of a booger but now we get along VERY well! We are 21 months apart (i am older)
He works on a TV show in the film department in a HUGE show called "Quilt in a Day" YEAH! :) He is going to college right now and is REALLY good at filming and editing and getting really good at acting! I am very proud of him!
He has a really sweet girlfriend who i love and they better get married because i dont think another Sister in Law can compare! :) the picture to the left is of them! AWWW!
We have had many ups and downs but he is still there and i love him TONS! :)